THE “REAL” ACTOR

One of my favorite self-help gurus is Marianne Williamson. I used to listen to her audiotapes in my car, and I always felt so terrific afterwards. I learned a great deal from her teachings.

One story she told was from her college days. She had begun singing in a club, and really enjoyed it. Although, maybe not the best singer, she had such a love for it, that she truly shined onstage. People started to come to the club, just to hear her sing.

One day she was filling out a form, which had asked what her occupation was. She was unsure at the time how to answer that, but a friend of hers said, “Put down ‘singer’. You are a singer.” And she did.

Later she started thinking, “I’m not really a singer. Those other, more talented, people who came before me, they were real singers. I better figure out how they did it. I’ve got to learn how to be a real singer.”

So, she started trying to perform the way she imagined a “real” singer would perform. People sensed this, and stopped coming to hear her sing. All the fun was gone from her performance. She had stopped giving herself permission to love and trust what she was doing, and instead came to her craft from fear and insecurity.

Now imagine what would’ve happened if she had just said to herself, “You know what, I’m not a singer. I release my need to be a singer. I’ll let all those other people who sing be the real singers. I’m just here to enjoy myself”. If she had thought that way, you can bet she would’ve had a lot more fun, the audience would’ve felt it, and the crowds would’ve returned.

Right before I perform, I like to tell myself, “I’m not an actor. Those other people in the show or in the audition waiting room, they’re the actors. Not me. I’m just here to play and have fun.”

Acting should be as playful and magical as it was when you were a kid. As soon as you take on the responsibility to be an “ACTOR”, the question comes up: “Am I talented enough, and have I done what it takes to be an actor?”

There are millions of books on acting, and millions of acting classes. You wouldn’t have the time to read and take them all, even if you tried.

Yes, it’s important to work on your craft. But don’t talk yourself into believing you don’t deserve to be an actor. Anyone who wants to act deserves to be an actor.

Some actors will say, “Yes, but I haven’t trained enough. I haven’t got enough experience to believe in myself yet.”

Ever heard of the book title “An Actor Prepares”? Just hearing that title can make you feel uneasy. How can you know whether you’ve prepared “enough”? The answer is that you have. You have, simply because that is the reality of the situation.

Everyone deserves to act. So stop worrying whether you’re good enough, or whether you’ve studied enough. You’re trying your best, and you’ve studied as much as you’ve studied, and you’ve had as much experience as you’ve had. You can’t change that, so accept it.

Let me ask you this:

What if there was a young man who worked in a gas station, and one day a film producer said, “You’d be perfect for this role in my movie.” Then the young man stars in the movie, and is so naturally talented, open and honest, that he wins an Oscar for his performance.

Would you say to that young man, “You don’t deserve to act. You haven’t studied for enough years, read enough books, paid for enough workshops”?

If not, then why do you say that to yourself? Don’t you deserve the respect you’d give him?

All actors have a vulture that at one time or another tells them, “You’re a terrible actor”.

The true test is how you react to that.

Even Laurence Olivier stopped performing for a period because he felt he was a lousy actor. Laurence Olivier!

I recently performed in an improv based comedy benefit. On my way to the stage I felt a heavy weight. I felt scared and insecure. I felt I had to fill some expectation from the audience to be funny. I was performing alongside some extremely talented and funny people, and my vulture was telling me that I wasn’t as good as them. That I was an impostor, and the audience would quickly find that out. I knew if I didn’t change my way of thinking, I would freeze up onstage and have a terrible experience.

So I put this thought in my head:

“I release my need to be a funny performer. They are the comedians; I’m just a guest here, having fun. I don’t need to be a funny actor. I’m just playing, and having fun.”

And I did have fun. I had a blast, and so did the audience.

You see, you can’t feel like an impostor, if you’re not interested in looking like anything other than just who you are.

You’ll never have the time to read all the thousands of books on acting that exist, nor take all the classes taught by all the brilliant teachers.

Stop needing to be a “real actor”. It is a goal that your ego has created, that you can never truly reach.

Just admit to yourself, “Whatever it is that I think I’m supposed to know, I don’t, and it doesn’t matter.”

Because the truth is that there is no secret to acting. Once you understand this, you’ll never feel the need to be something other than yourself again.

I received the following email from one of my workshop attendees:

“Wanted to tell you a little success story. Last time I was in class you talked about going to an audition where you felt great in the waiting room until another actor you knew came in - somebody that you thought was a better fit for the part - but then you said your affirmations and went into the room and had a great time.

I had a similar experience - I went in to audition to play Tommy Hilfiger in a sketch on a new comedy show. Anyway, I thought to myself that I look like Tommy Hilfiger. I got to the audition and there were three other guys who looked dead on like him. I started to go to that negative place in my head but remembered your story. I said "fuck it" and remembered that I wasn't there to be an actor, or get the job--I was there to have fun. Went in and gave a great audition. That would be a great ending to the story--but the icing on the cake is I got the gig!”